Going Solo: Are You Willing To Do THIS Alone In Public?

Going Solo: Are You Willing To Do THIS Alone In Public?

My husband is still laughing at this.

Well, laughing at me.

Story goes back to a few years ago when we were dating, snuggled up on the couch watching “Dancing With The Stars.”  He sweetly asked me, “Would you ever want to take ballroom dance lessons?”


I thought about it a second and said, “You mean, together?”

He still howls at this because, as he points out, how else do you take ballroom dance lessons? Who takes ballroom dance lessons alone?

Uh, that would be me.

When you’re single as long as I was, when you constantly picked guys who didn’t do more than toss a few cookie crumbs of their time your way, you learn to do a lot of stuff by yourself.

Yes, including sign up for ballroom dance lessons.

I got thinking about this the other day when I came across this study which confirms Husband’s theory that he married a different bird. A business professor at the University of Maryland says Americans are not going out, if that means having to go out alone.

Does this sound like you, Dear Reader?

Where do you draw your line in the comfort zone sand?

Would you go out to a restaurant by yourself?

dien alone

To a movie?

movie alone

Take dance lessons?

According to this study, most of you won’t if it means going solo.

The reason?

You’re too worried about what other people would think when they see you out by yourself.

Screen Shot 2015-05-25 at 8.37.16 AM

Here’s the punch line on that one—

Another study shows people aren’t watching you. They’re not judging you, probably because they’re too busy being self-conscious about what people are thinking about them!

Screen Shot 2015-05-25 at 8.38.38 AM

Seems to me, we all have some kind of challenge to overcome to live our lives more fully.

For me, it has been getting used to a whole cookie kind of guy. A man who wants to spend a lot of time with me and go do stuff.

Yes, together.

We haven't made it to those dance lessons yet, but have done tons of fun stuff like learning to fly fish.
We haven’t made it to those dance lessons yet, but have done tons of fun stuff like learning to fly fish.

They really do make guys like that. Who knew? Certainly not me until well into my 40’s.

And you?

You need to get over yourself and those imaginary people who, I promise, will not be judging you if you get out there by yourself for dinner, a movie, or even dance lessons.

And then there’s this—

When that hottie instructor is twirling you across the dance floor as the music makes a symphony in your heart, the last thing you will be thinking about is being alone.

dance instructor

I know because I’ve certainly danced that dance.

The last laugh is going to be all yours.

Find more uplifting stories on my website, DarynKagan.com

Please catch my newspaper column each week in the Atlanta Journal Constitution, the Dayton Daily News and other newspapers across Ohio.

One thought on “Going Solo: Are You Willing To Do THIS Alone In Public?

  1. I just recently met someone after being single for most of my 50 years so I can relate.I would eat out alone but not on friday or saturday nights and no where I would have to wait alone for a table. I would do the same with movies. I would go to matinees during the week and after they had been out awhile. Sometimes I would be the only person in the theater. I would be semi-comfortable as long as it was not crowded and it was not all couples there. I’m not taking dance lessons with or without someone lol.There are somethings I enjoy by myself and some I tolerate and some I refuse to do. Thanks Daryn for remembering what it is like and reminding us that we are not the only single people ever


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